Better Together

That Jack Johnson dude was really onto something with this whole "better together" thing. Some things really are just better in pairs - the wholes becomes greater than the sum of their parts. Like a left shoe and right shoe. Individually, they're almost worthless (unless you're a peg-legged pirate; I suppose then having one shoe would be pretty worthwhile). But together...wow. Magic happens. Here's a quick rundown of what I believe to be are the top five pairings in the world.

#5: Hot summer days + cold watermelon

We start our list with a pairing that is enjoyed by people of all ages and cultures. Whether you're an Asian kid whose mom cuts fruit every night after dinner or an old Southerner who enjoys a slice of watermelon while playing a banjo on the patio, it's hard to deny the joy of biting into a cold, sweet piece of watermelon when the weather heats up.

Summer and watermelon go so well together that in this garden-variety Google Image Search result, the plate of watermelon is sitting on what appears to be a patio table. Outdoors.

I'm sure there are some of you who will disagree and say something ridiculous, like ice cream is better on summer days. I suppose everyone is entitled to his/her opinion. But here's the problem with ice cream on hot days: from the moment you open up your ice cream, it's a race against time as you try to eat it before it melts and just becomes really thick milk and sugar and cream (yum!). And then of course there's the horrible, overwhelming sense of guilt that overtakes your mind and soul for eating that caloric serving of evil.

#4: Peanut butter + jelly / ham + cheese / cereal + milk (tie)

Alright so I'm gonna go all U.S. News on you and have a billion-way tie at #4. But the staples of my childhood diet belong on this list because 1) they're delicious; and b) without them I probably would have starved.

Here's a good illustration of how clutch PB&J is: my friends and I were at a grocery store shopping for food to take with us on our annual snowboarding trip. Our options were almost unlimited - with a shopping cart that was almost empty and a generous budget, we could have chosen just about anything to take with us. One of the very first things that found its way into our cart? Jamwiches.

But the significance of this isn't necessarily that Jamwiches were one of our first purchases, but rather, that Jamwiches exist at all. For those of you who don't know, Jamwiches are pre-made PB&J sandwiches that you stick in the freezer and then microwave when you're ready to eat (think Hot Pockets, but PB&J). That means there's enough of a demand for PB&J sandwiches from people who are too lazy and/or too incompetent to make their own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches they actually make and sell pre-made Jamwiches (yes, my friends and I are among those lazy incompetents).

Remarkable.

#3: Pizza + beer

This pairing is best explained with the following photos, taken while I was strolling through Manhattan.

Pronto Pizza and Beer! What a great name - implies fast service and gives you a pretty good idea of what kind of stuff they offer. It's open, has its own ATM machine and some nifty neon lights, and it looks like there might be a woman who's headed in to get something. Definitely a place you might stop by if you get hungry while walking around.

And then there's...

...Pronto Pizza! Same idea, same street (literally just a few steps down from the first place), same name even, but no beer. Now let's observe: it's closed, got a bunch of trash outside next to a dumpster that's probably full of even more trash, and could easily be one of those places that you walk by a million times without ever noticing.

The difference (seriously) is the beer.

#2: Kobe Bryant + Los Angeles Lakers

The relationship Kobe has with Laker fans is, in my opinion, only rivaled by the relationship Derek Jeter has with Yankee fans. They're both incredibly easy to hate if they're not on your team, but equally difficult to root against when they are on your team. Both are undeniably talented but have a ton of sports fans wondering if they're overrated. Both play in huge markets for the most glamorous franchises of their respective sports. And both happen to look like freaking prom kings.

Ugh.

Of course, the similarities end there. One got married very young; the other is a bachelor who plays the field (and what a field it is...in fact, Mr. Yankee Captain gets an honorable mention down below). One has always been seen as selfish and egotistical; the other is known as the consummate team player. One guy tosses leather balls through hoops, the other hits cowhide balls with wooden sticks (and suddenly, their jobs seem very ordinary).

Anyway, I digress. The point is that no other team - and perhaps more importantly, no other teams' fans - would embrace such a complicated and controversial figure the way Laker fans do Kobe. Laker fans - and Laker fans only - have his back. And Kobe, in return, embraces and embodies everything LA. As much as Kobe has led the Lakers to the top of the NBA, the Lakers have also helped him become the league's premier star for more than a decade.

#1: Korean food + kimchi

Numero uno (sometimes, when you're talking about Korean food, you just have to speak Spanish). I mean, who doesn't want to eat pickled, salted cabbage smothered in chili powder? Anyone?

Mmm...

Honorable mentions: Batman + Robin, Derek Jeter + (insert ridiculously hot model/actress/singer/beauty queen), baseball + sunflower seeds, Tom Cruise + women taller than Tom Cruise, Super Bowl + nachos, Barry Bonds + steroids, coffee shops + wi-fi, law school + self-loathing.