At first, the idea that certain things might come more easily to certain people doesn't seem all that controversial, especially when it comes to feats of athleticism. I used to be an elementary school teacher, and it didn't take much to notice that some kids could just naturally run faster and jump higher than others.
And yet.
Sports analysts seem to have a hard time hurdling the race issue in their assessment of players. Here's what I mean.
Ex. 1: Dirk Nowitzki, Adam Morrison, Jimmer Fredette, and/or any white guy in the NBA who can score even a little.
What do Dirk, Ammo, and Jimmer all have in common, other than the color of their skin?
The correct answer is: (1) not a whole lot; and (2) they're always compared to this guy:
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| Celtics great Larry Bird, archetype of the successful white NBA player. |
Why? Why?! Is it not because they're kinda slow-footed white dudes who, notwithstanding their height, don't look like they belong in a league that's more than 80 percent black? The actual playing styles, demeanors, accomplishments, and ceilings for the three players above are all wildly different, yet they're all compared to Larry Bird.
On the plus side, this means that when I achieve my childhood dream and become the shortstop for the Los Angeles Dodgers, I'm going to be compared to former Dodger pitcher and Korean hero Chan Ho Park.
Some people might not view a comparison to an ultimately mediocre and overpaid player as a plus, but those people don't realize that this is the first picture that comes up when you run a Google Image Search for "chan ho park":
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| JUMPING SIDEKICK OF DEATH. AZN PRIDE. |
Now all I need to do is learn how to hit, field, run, and throw at a major league level. I'd also probably need to grow four inches taller, add 30 pounds of muscle, and learn how to take steroids without getting caught. Easy.
Ex. 2: Team Japan in the Little League World Series, Team China in the Olympics, and/or any East Asian country competing against non-East Asian countries.
The Little League World Series is completely effed up. What seemingly started out as a fun idea – "Hey let's have a worldwide tournament for Little Leaguers and televise it! It'll be fun and a great experience for the kids!" – has morphed into something resembling child exploitation.
But it's hard to avoid watching at least part of it if you watch ESPN at all. When it gets going, it really gets going. They even bring in former Major League players as commentators. Hardcore.
And when you do watch it, you notice two things. First, Team Japan is always really good. And second, if you believe the analysts, they're always really good because of their "discipline."
The amount of time the commentators spend talking about the team's discipline borders on ridiculous: they note how the team doesn't talk when the coach is talking (honestly, how many players actually talk while the coach is talking?) or how much the kids seem to know their "roles" (in baseball, I'd say your role is pretty well-defined: you're either pitching, hitting, or patrolling a certain area waiting to catch something). I half-expect them to throw in the terms "filial piety" and "Confucian values" during the broadcast.
How about this? Japan is a country that loves baseball and produces talented baseball players. Sometimes, their teams win.
No...that doesn't seem right. It's definitely the discipline. When Korea played Japan in the World Baseball Classic, the sheer amount of discipline in the game was straight-up mind-blowing.
Ex. 3: Michael Vick, Cam Newton, Vince Young, and/or any black quarterback with some athleticism.
It seems like every year, there's a quarterback who is supposed to revolutionize the position because – wait for it – he's a dual threat. He can throw AND run!
Let's set aside for a moment the fact that it's damn near impossible to "revolutionize" the QB position in the NFL, where a QB's success largely depends on whether he can drop back in the pocket and accurately throw to the right receiver. Have you noticed that these supposed revolutionaries are all African American?
No one mentions that the most successful scrambling quarterback ever was Steve Young, a white guy who played college ball at BYU, of all places. And no one really mentions in the same breath the most obvious QB who does as much with his legs as his arm: Mr. Tim Tebow.
Just to cement my point – this was part of an actual scouting report of JaMarcus Russell:
"Could be a Daunte Culpepper or Donavan McNabb-type quarterback."
Seriously?
Ex. 4: Edward Han.
People watch me play sports and frequently use phrases like, "At least he's trying hard," or "Not bad for a 5'9" Asian boy with no hops and a history of ankle/back problems, but pretty bad by basically any other measure," or "No no, he's on your team," or "He really sucks." I think this is racist.
The Little League World Series is completely effed up. What seemingly started out as a fun idea – "Hey let's have a worldwide tournament for Little Leaguers and televise it! It'll be fun and a great experience for the kids!" – has morphed into something resembling child exploitation.
But it's hard to avoid watching at least part of it if you watch ESPN at all. When it gets going, it really gets going. They even bring in former Major League players as commentators. Hardcore.
And when you do watch it, you notice two things. First, Team Japan is always really good. And second, if you believe the analysts, they're always really good because of their "discipline."
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| Japan: known for sushi, electronics, and under-12-year-old baseball players. |
The amount of time the commentators spend talking about the team's discipline borders on ridiculous: they note how the team doesn't talk when the coach is talking (honestly, how many players actually talk while the coach is talking?) or how much the kids seem to know their "roles" (in baseball, I'd say your role is pretty well-defined: you're either pitching, hitting, or patrolling a certain area waiting to catch something). I half-expect them to throw in the terms "filial piety" and "Confucian values" during the broadcast.
How about this? Japan is a country that loves baseball and produces talented baseball players. Sometimes, their teams win.
No...that doesn't seem right. It's definitely the discipline. When Korea played Japan in the World Baseball Classic, the sheer amount of discipline in the game was straight-up mind-blowing.
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| Ichiro. So |
Ex. 3: Michael Vick, Cam Newton, Vince Young, and/or any black quarterback with some athleticism.
It seems like every year, there's a quarterback who is supposed to revolutionize the position because – wait for it – he's a dual threat. He can throw AND run!
Let's set aside for a moment the fact that it's damn near impossible to "revolutionize" the QB position in the NFL, where a QB's success largely depends on whether he can drop back in the pocket and accurately throw to the right receiver. Have you noticed that these supposed revolutionaries are all African American?
No one mentions that the most successful scrambling quarterback ever was Steve Young, a white guy who played college ball at BYU, of all places. And no one really mentions in the same breath the most obvious QB who does as much with his legs as his arm: Mr. Tim Tebow.
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| Tebow running for his life. Seems about right. |
Just to cement my point – this was part of an actual scouting report of JaMarcus Russell:
"Could be a Daunte Culpepper or Donavan McNabb-type quarterback."
Seriously?
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| Daunte Culpepper. |
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| Donovan McNabb. |
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| JaMarcus Russell. |
Does the fact that they're all black automatically make the analysis racist? No. But when you consider that these three actually don't have that much in common, I think the analysis is, at the very least, lazy.
Ex. 4: Edward Han.
People watch me play sports and frequently use phrases like, "At least he's trying hard," or "Not bad for a 5'9" Asian boy with no hops and a history of ankle/back problems, but pretty bad by basically any other measure," or "No no, he's on your team," or "He really sucks." I think this is racist.
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| On my butt. Common position for me when boarding. |
